Sequel to Ichigo Does Not Approve
Ichigo Still Does Not Approve
Ichigo sighed heavily as he stared at the empty fridge… again. He knew something was definitely up. Rukia was neglecting her girlfriend duties, all of them… including "bed" time, which was insanely annoying, and left him with the worse case of blue balls.
This time however, it wasn't "fanfiction" that was ruining his life. It was what she called, "fanart."
He sighed again. In all honestly, whatever these so-called "fans" create, it always ended up pissing him off one way or another. Either it was just total non-sense and stupidity, or it just distracted his girlfriend from the real world and him.
"Awwww! Ichigo, you look so cute as a girl!" Rukia turned the laptop so he could see the picture, or "fanart." It was him… as a girl. Who would have ever thought? He looked like an angrier version of Inoue, but with spiky-ish hair, which was disturbing above all else. He simply was not a girl.
Yup, this is what he had to deal with for the past week and a half, "gender benders," extremely cheesy crap, cosplays [now this he thought was scary], "IchiRuki" calendars and "shipping" war crap. He honestly didn't understand any of this shit, but it didn't really matter. He had given up trying to understand fandom awhile ago.
Ichigo plopped on to the couch in the living room next to Rukia and turned on the TV. He rested his head on the armrest and snuggled his feet under Rukia's thighs. He dully flipped from channel to channel, yawning as all the channels went by before stopping on "The Adventures of Chappy the Rabbit." He didn't know why he did. He just did it.
"Oooh! I wonder if this is the episode where the witch tries to capture Chappy?" asked Rukia, to no one in particular. She watched the TV intently, occasionally glancing down at the laptop screen.
"Rukia, when are you finally gonna get off the computer?" Ichigo just watched as she completely ignored him as usual. It felt like he was just another spirit floating around with no presence. "Earth to Rukia? Hello?"
She tilted her head his way, but didn't look at him, or answer.
"Kuchiki Rukia, will you fucking listen to me?" he said a few decibels higher, poking her in the cheek with his toe.
"What?" She smacked his foot away from her face, and looked at him with a hint of annoyance.
"Well, I was wondering when you'd get OFF the damn computer and go get groceries. If you haven't noticed, take out isn't going to last us forever!" He frowned and started poking her in the side with his foot.
"Can't you get the groceries?" she said, smacking away his foot.
"No can do. I have classes to go to, and you're better at picking foo- you have more time on your hands than I do."
"Or is it 'cause you're just lazy?" She said, teasing him. "In some of the fanfics I've read, you're not that lazy. You'd do anything for me."
"If you haven't noticed, it's called 'fanfiction!' It's not real! Obviously I don't actually act like that, so stop comparing fandom to reality," he jabbed her on the side with his foot, making her jump and shriek in surprise.
She narrowed her eyes, and placed the laptop down on the coffee table and pounced on Ichigo's stomach like a ninja, pushing all the air out of him.
He sucked in a large breath and glared daggers at the girl on top of him, "What the fuck was that for? I almost died!" he yelled, heaving for breath.
She stuck her tongue out, "Technically you're already dead, and you're a shinigami. Your chain of fate was destroyed."
"Aren't you a smart ass now?"
"Yup!" said Rukia, suddenly feeling the urge to make a random act of affection. She leaned down to give him a quick peck on the lips, nose and then the forehead. He just looked too cute not to kiss him!
She rested her head in his neck and nuzzled her cheek in the spot where his shoulder and neck meet.
Ichigo took a whiff of her hair and sighed. It had been awhile since she's shown any affection since her obsession with fanfiction. Nowadays, just by touching her made him horny –not that it wasn't like that before, he just had more restraint.
As he was about to dive for her neck, she abruptly sat up, making him catch nothing by the cold air.
Damn, cock-blocked again…
She reached for the computer and picked it up, "I forgot to show you this! Apparently, people also make 'hentai doujin and fanart.'" She clicked on a link and turned the laptop towards him.
Ichigo gawked as his eye scanned the contents on the screen.
First, there was those creepy "smutty lemony" fanfics as Rukia called them. And then there was… hentai of them? To make it worse,
"My dick is not that small!"
Rukia raised a black brow, "Well, aren't you a little conceited?" she said smirking.
"I'm not being conceited, I'm stating the truth! Look at that thing, that is not my size," he said, pointing to whatever was on the screen. "And you're hotter in real life. Your breasts aren't that small, they're small, but not that small."
She raised her brow even higher up her head.
Ichigo continued to look through the hentai doujin and fanarts. "What the hell? This one has Ulquiorra and Inoue," he said, scrolling down the page. "God! Nasty! I did not want to see that!
"Wait, is that you and Renji? What the fuck? Oh, good, I'm in there too."
Rukia observed him as he looked through the hentai with much concentration. She didn't know if it was just her, but he looked like he was enjoying it. Psst… and he says he's not a perv, she thought, chuckling to herself.
Something that did surprise her though was the fact that he didn't question it at all.
"Okay, those breasts are way too big. It looks like they'll rip right through the bathing suit…," he said. "Hey, you look really sexy in that playboy bunny outfit. Don't we have one in the closet that Rangiku got you last year? I don't think we ever tried it out."
Okay, maybe that case of blue balls has finally gotten to his head.
"Well… why don't we try it out right now?" she said suggestively, rubbing her foot against the inside of his thighs. She batted her eyelashes at him and smiled mischievously.
He immediately froze and just stared at her. Was she actually making a move to start moving furniture?
He grinned, ah, what the hell? Any chance he would get to have sex with Rukia, he was going to take it. "Yes, why don't we?" He picked her up and brought her into their bedroom, shutting the door with his foot and locking the door behind him.
Goodbye blue balls!